Darkness
by caromal
Summary: My view on how the end of 7.21 would have gone if they kept showing after Haley jumps into her pool.


**Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill or anything to do with it. I wish.  
**

**Itallics are Haley's thoughts.**__

Just do it Haley.

Just do it.

And I jumped.

The salty water of my pool engulfed me, clouding my vision. I closed my eyes for a second, and then reopened them to see pure blue in front of me. I let out a large air bubble, wondering exactly how someone was supposed to drown themselves. I wasn't exactly an expert in the suicide category. I had never thought that I would ever want to commit suicide, _ever, _but lately, it's like my mind had been altered by darkness. I lit my piano on fire. My very expensive piano. Not that it really mattered; Nathan could just buy a new one. But burning that piano was where I realized that I had truly gone crazy. When Nathan pulled me away from the fire and asked if I was okay, I wanted to run over to him and cry in his arms, but the bleeding part of my mind couldn't find the strength to leave the darkness. And those shadows kept on deepening, until I was too far lost to function right. I would wake up in the morning, not even say good morning to Nathan, which I would hate myself for doing, go into the bathroom, cry for a while, ignoring Nathan's desperate knocks on the door. I would then go outside and sit in the backyard for the rest of the day, trying to block reality out of my life. I don't remember the last time I showered. I don't remember the last time I told Jamie I loved him. I don't remember the last time I kissed Nathan.

And that was sad.

So, I figured that there was no going back. Jamie and Nathan probably thought I was insane, and I _knew _I was insane, so there was only one choice.

Jump. 

The water started filling up my lungs, my vision going hazy. My life with Nathan flashed before my eyes. First study session, first date, first kiss, marriage, tour, renewing our vows, having Jamie, Nathan making the NBA. I thought of Nathan's warm blue eyes. How that every time I looked into them, I fell more in love with him.

How the hell could I leave him?

My vision broke from the haze, as I realized that darkness or no darkness, I was _never _leaving Nathan. I tried to find that strength I had been lacking in the weeks before, but something was stuck.

The bottom of my stupid pant leg was stuck to the drain on the floor of the pool.

I wanted to reach down and pull it off and swim to freedom, but my limbs suddenly felt 1000 pounds. Giving up, I slowly started to let my soul drift to the light.

Until a pair of muscular arms pulled me away from that very appealing light. My mind snapped back into consciousness, and I felt the bottom of my pant leg rip free.

We broke the surface of the water, the cold night air nipping at my wet skin. I felt Nathan's chest pumping as he swam to the side of the pool, bringing me to safety. I tried to breathe, but my lungs were filled to the top with water. I heard Nathan's voice, distant, but there. It was filled with worry and panic.

"Haley, baby. No, don't leave me, Haley, please!" Nathan's voice broke in distress as he pleaded for my life. I hated myself for putting him through so much pain. I felt his hands pushing my chest up and down, until finally, water started sprouting out of my lungs. I coughed uncontrollably, the rest of the water pouring out. I felt Nathan's strong arms wrap around me. His damp forehead was leaning against mine, his breathing ragged. I opened my eyes to see his closed, tears streaming down his cheeks. Seeing this broken sight made my heart stop. I closed my eyes, relishing this moment with him. It was frantic, and it was serious, but somehow, still intimate. He kissed my forehead and nose repeatedly, whispering incoherent things to me. His tears never seemed to end, even when he finally opened his bloodshot eyes to stare into mine.

"_Never_ do that to me again." He whispered roughly. "I can't live without you Haley. I _can't_." His heart breaking sobs returned as he hugged me closely again. For the first time since my mother's death, I felt something other than numbness. I felt raw emotion bubbling through me. My eyes started watering along with his, soon turning into hysterics.

"I...am...so...sorry," I choked out, burying my face into Nathan's shoulder. I felt his lips on my temple, soothing me. He pulled away for me briefly, only to catch my lips in his.

And we kissed, for the first time in God knows how long.

And I was happy, for the first time in God knows how long.

**The End.**

Sorry it was really short ;p I'm no good with this depressing stuff, but I love Naley so much I wanted to write a fanfic about them. (:

R&R!


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